If you would find your real life, lose the counterfeit one with all the drama

A friend of mine asked , Jesus says in Matthew 10:39 "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." It is written in the seventh chapter of the Tao Te Ching that because the master has let go of himself, he is perfectly fulfilled. These statements seem paradoxical, contradictory. I don't get it. What do they mean?

I tried to answer as best I could because I'm not sure I get it either, at least not in my dichotomous mind which wants to reduce things to their component parts and think things through in a logical way. 

In order to understand the paradox of losing your life to find it, you have to think systemically and intuitively. It has been taught in A Course In Miracles, and in other mystical traditions, that the ego world is not real. We have made it up when we separated ourselves from godliness. We did this when we thought we knew better than God. This separation is alluded to in the book of Genesis when Adam and Eve ate the apple from the tree of knowledge. The so called "original sin" was thinking that we can create our own universe apart from God and as we become more aware and conscious we come to realize that our creations, our drama on the ego plane, is not real and not what we really want. In fact we often experience our ego creations and drama as hell. Jesus says to us simply, "drop it." This so called "life" you have created with all its drama, pain, and suffering is just nonsense. You cannot find your real life until you get rid of this false life which you have made up and participate in. As you point out, it says the same thing in the Tao Te Ching. We can't be fulfilled until we let the bull shit go.

One of my favorite bumper stickers says, "Don't believe everything you think." A lot of the stuff we think and then believe is fraudulent, counterfeit, not the real deal. Both Jesus and the Tao Te Ching are teaching us to detach from the life on the ego plane which we have created in our own minds.

So, for today, let go and let God as they say in Alcoholics Anonymous. Surrender to your Higher Power whatever you conceive your Higher Power to be. Admit that your life is unmanageable and let go and let God. While it is scary to do this at first, being willing to surrender to the Will of God, to the Tao brings blessed peace.